The darkness

Extract from my journal from December ‘08

“ Sometimes pain tricks you into thinking there’s something romantic or noble about it. It’s as if you wear your pain like a vail, like you’re nothing without it. It tricks you into thinking it owns you and that it is a part of your essence. You can’t remember a time that it wasn’t part of you. Pain is something you carry around in your soul, everywhere you go. Like leaving it behind will be leaving a part of yourself.

Bu there’s nothing romantic or fairytale-like about pain.

Today I realized that I’m happt. It happened slowly, without a big event or a certain moment in time. I just noticed the difference between today and the last time I was here.

The dark is dark. The light is light. Lighter than you can ever imagine. The Light is worth fighting for.
There’s nothing light about the darkness…it’s only dark”